July 28, 2026

Why words matter when we talk about scams

Show Notes
Transcript

Far too often, the blame for financial fraud is directed at the victims rather than the criminals. We say things like “he fell for a romance scam” when in reality, a criminal targeted, manipulated, and exploited this person. There is currently a movement to change the narrative around financial fraud by eliminating victim-blaming language. Changing the narrative empowers victims to contact the authorities and seek support.

Let’s Talk About Scams is broadcast live Tuesdays at 8AM PT on K4HD Radio - Hollywood Talk Radio (www.k4hd.com) part of Talk 4 Radio (www.talk4radio.com) on the Talk 4 Media Network (www.talk4media.com). Let’s Talk About Scams TV Show is viewed on Talk 4 TV (www.talk4tv.com).

Let’s Talk About Scams Podcast is also available on Talk 4 Media (www.talk4media.com), Talk 4 Podcasting (www.talk4podcasting.com), iHeartRadio, Amazon Music, Pandora, Spotify, Audible, and over 100 other podcast outlets.

Disclaimer: The information contained in this podcast is intended for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for individual professional / legal advice. The podcast information was carefully compiled from vetted sources and references; however, R.O.S.E. Resources / Outreach to Safeguard the Elderly cannot guarantee that you will not fall victim to a scam.

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This program is designed to provide general information with regards

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legal advice. The podcast information was carefully compiled from vetted

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sources and references. However, Rose Resources outreach to safeguard the

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elderly cannot guarantee that you will not fall victim to

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a scam. Let's talk about scams. It's the must listen

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show for anyone who wants to protect themselves and their

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here is your host, Joyce Petrowski. Hi, I'm David saying

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active mentally, thank chess. Those are all very important things.

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Good morning, everybody. My name is Brian Watson. I'm filling

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in for Joyce Petrowski and thanks for tuning into Let's

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Talk about Scams. We are going to talk today about

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the words that we use, and the title of today's

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show is why words matter when we talk about scams.

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So I am a huge Simpsons fan. Simpsons fan, the

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TV show on Fox. It has been on for a

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long time. It's like the longest running show on TV.

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That's and it's not as good as it used to be,

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I'll admit that, but I'm still a huge Simpsons fan.

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But I started watching The Simpsons when I was in college.

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And if you know anything about the Simpsons is you

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know it's a comedy, but it's very irreverent and they

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will make fun of everybody and everything. There is nothing

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that's off limits. So I've always appreciated that sense of

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humor and the writer's ability to poke fund poke fun

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at everyone. So a few years ago, it was season

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thirty three to be exact, there was an episode where

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a phone scammer calls Grandpa Simpson and on the phone call,

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it's he's told that his grandson Bart is in jail

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and he needs to pay ten thousand dollars to the

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authorities to get Bart out of jail. It's the classic

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grandparent scam that Joyce and I have talked about on

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this show. And so in the episode, Grandpa sends the

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ten thousand dollars and then his son Homer finds out,

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and of course Homer is not happy about it. And

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in the episode, Homer says all the things you never

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say to someone who lost money in a scam, and

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I mean, it's way over the top, you know. I

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mean that's the thing with the Simpsons does. It's over

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the top, and it's like the worst things you could say.

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So what did Homer say? He said, I would I

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would have never fallen for that. Everyone knows that's a scam.

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And then what were you thinking? You know, it's all

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the terrible things you say to a victim. So, you know,

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the episode made its point in trying to prove, you know,

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trying to have a little bit of humor and a

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really awful crime. But I liked it because it brings

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scams into the spotlight. Anytime we can talk about out scams,

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talk about the fraud that's out there, it's a good

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thing because the frustrating part about doing what we do

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is we keep hearing about people that lose money. I

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in the map past month, I have interacted with three

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people who either lost money or in the process of

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losing money, and it's extremely frustrating. It just seems to

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never end. But we got to keep fighting. So it

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got me thinking the words we choose in this field

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is they really do matter. And it's not about being

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politically correct. It's not the word place. But what we

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need to do is focus the blame on the criminal

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and not the victim. Too often in fraud prevention we

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focus on the victim and what they did or didn't do,

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but you know, far too often it's the blame for

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this fraud is directed at the victims rather than the criminals.

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We say things like Grandpa fell for a romance scam,

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when in reality, a criminal targeted, manipulated, and exploited this person,

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or we say something like she lost money in a

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tech support scam. Well, in reality, the money was stolen,

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it was not lost, it was not willingly given away.

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I've been guilty of using this language on many occasion.

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Occasions I've said so and so fell for a scam.

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I mean, even in our intro for this radio show,

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it says, you know, this advice will not guarantee that

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you won't, you know, fall for a scam. You know.

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And I know I'm being picky and I'm not trying to,

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you know, you know, be too hard on ourselves, but

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these matters, you know, even victims say these words. You know,

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I met someone earlier this month and she specifically said

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she fell for a scam. It happened to be the

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publisher's clearing house scam, which we're going to talk about

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soon because that thing keeps coming back as well. But

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this language is deeply ingrained in our culture. So today

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I've noticed, and I'm making an effort. I'm trying to

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be more intentional in the words, so that I choose

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when I interact with victims and when I do presentations

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and when I do radio shows like this, you know,

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like to give you an example. We've covered the term

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pig butchering multiple times on this show. Reminder, pig butchering,

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it's when scammers approach people in one way or another,

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almost always online, sometimes through a romance scam, sometimes through

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a family or friend, and they get you excited about

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the possibility of investing in cryptocurrency, and then what happens

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is is it's called pig butchering because they get you

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to they look at you as a pig. They get

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you to invest all the money you have. They don't

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kill you physically, they kill you financially. They fatten you

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up for the slaughter like a farmer would do with

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a pig. Now there's this big debate, especially online places

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like LinkedIn where us fraud fighters that we don't like

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this term. You know, the good thing about pig butchering

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is it gets people's attention. When I do a presentation,

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people their eyes light up and they look up when

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I say pig butchering. But you know, it's it's not

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good because we're focusing the victor, focusing the attention on

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the victim and almost blaming them and calling them pigs.

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It's awful. So a more appropriate term that I've started

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to use is cryptocurrency investment fraud. I know the FBI

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is using this term, so I've been I've been trying

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to do that. I'll mention pig butchering once, but then

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quickly transition to cryptocurrency investment fraud. You know, and some

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of my fellow fraud fighters, we're even going as far

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as not to use the term scammer why because it

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doesn't sound as bad as a criminal. And others have

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started using a term romance fraud instead of romance scam.

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So there's all these little, just slight variations where we're

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just trying to show a little more respect to the

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victim and focus the attention where the attention needs to

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be focused on these awful, ruthless financial predators that are

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stealing money from us. AARP initiated a campaign called Words Matter,

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and the whole point of it is to change the

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societal narrative around this financial fraud by eliminating this victim

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blaming language. So the movement is trying to urge public media,

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law enforcement to shift that focus from the victim to

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the criminal. And you know why, you know, say nicer words.

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But more importantly, the goal of this campaign is to

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encourage reporting. If we inadvertently blame the victims or maybe

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blame them for part of it, it keeps them from

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speaking up, and these crimes continue. You know, the numbers

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keep going up every year. Joyce has shared these numbers.

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I've shared these numbers, but they're really hard. The really

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bad part is only a fraction of the actual crimes

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are being reported. You know, some people think it's you know,

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only five, ten or fifteen percent. Most crimes go unreported

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because people are embarrassed, people don't know who to report to.

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There's so many different options. They figure what's the point,

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or they're just so overwhelmed and they don't have time,

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and they're going through another financial crisis. They just they

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don't want to bring up the trauma of losing money.

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So when we change that narrative, it really empowers victims

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to contact the authorities and seek support. I mean, I

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spoke to a lady last week who's eighty nine years old,

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and she said, I am embarrassed, and you know, it

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took her a long time to get to that point,

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and I was very proud of her, and you know,

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I just reassured her. I said, you know, look I've

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met a lot of people who have lost money, and

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you're not the only one, and it takes a lot

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for you to come to that realization. You know that

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you lost money, and I just try to encourage her,

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but it's horrible. So here's some of the like improved

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wording that we can use just as an example. So

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instead of saying how much money did you give them?

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We can say how much did the criminals steal? See

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what we did? We focused the attention on the criminal.

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Instead of saying something like scam are so clever, they

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tricked you, we can say a criminal stole your money

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through a web of lies and deceit. And then the

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last one I want to share right now. Instead of saying,

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how could you fall for that? You know the thing

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that Homer did in the Simpsons episode, or didn't you

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see the warning flags? We can say this isn't your fault.

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You experienced a crime. So see what we did. The

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wording is not completely different. We're acknowledging what's going on,

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but we're focusing the attention on the criminal. Act. Monthly,

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I get to write articles for the Green Valley News.

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It's a newspaper in southern Arizona, south of Tucson, and

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the column is called fraud Fire. And you know, I've

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looked back and I've noticed some of the terms that

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I've used are the ones we talk about today, you know.

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And I'm and I'm not blaming myself or I'm not

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bare for what I said before, because it's all accurate.

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But we can all improve. We can all get better

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at this. And as you know, as someone who's involved

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in fighting fraud, I know I can get better, and

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I want to get better for the main purpose of

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focusing the blame on the criminals. So I promise everyone

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out there, when I write future articles, I'm just going

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to review them one last time and say, could this

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be improved? Where's the focus? Am I blaming the victim

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even a slight bit when I shouldn't and focus all

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the attention on the criminal? All right? That's all I

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have today. I hope you enjoyed it. We really want

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you to share this information. If you learn something today

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on this radio show, send the link to a friend

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or a family member. Tell them, Look, it's only fifteen

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minutes to your time, and it's well worth it. Share

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these videos because if they just set up on the

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Internet and no one watches them. The criminals win. Do

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your part today. It's free, only takes a few clicks.

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Tell your friend, hey, do Brian just talked about you

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know the language you use for criminals. I think you'll

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get something out of it. And please sign up for

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our mailing list. Our mailing list keeps growing and we

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love that. Rosadvocacy dot Org. You go on the landing page,

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scroll down to the bottom, there's a blue box where

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you can sign up for our mailing list. And it's

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an email that comes out once a month and at

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the beginning of the month, and then every Tuesday morning

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we give you a little snippet, something more bite sized.

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It's just much shorter. The whole point of this is

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we have to keep scam prevention on our mind all

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the time, because if we don't and we get lazy

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about it, that's when the criminals have a chance to

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get us. And all of us are going to be

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confronted by these criminals at one time or another, it

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happens to all of us. Need to be prepared. It's

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like doing practice. It's like going to football practice or

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track practice. We have to constantly be practicing. How what

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we're going to do. When a scammer, email, phone call,

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text message, or something on social media comes after us,

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we will be We're ready to respond. And you know,

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especially look out for anybody out there who lives by themselves.

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Those are the people I really worry about. You know.

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Invest in your neighbors, your family, your friends. Make sure

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everyone out there is being taken care of. All right, everybody,

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thank you for listening. I'm going to be back next

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week as well with another message. It's an honor to

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fill in for Joyce, and we'll see you next week

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on Let's talk about scams.

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Well, that's all the knowledge for this episode. Tune in

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every Tuesday at eight am Pacific time on KFOURHD Radio

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at kfoorahd dot com as Joyce explores a variety of knowledge.

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So you have the power to make scam protection your

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healthy habit and until then, feel free to reach out

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to Joyce and Let's talk about scams.

Why words matter when we talk about scams

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